THE THRILL IS GONE

I can't believe it, my writing career is over, two months of writing is flushed. My career as an Action / Suspense writer is over. I'll have to find a new , more tame genre. I learned this morning that the highest courts in Saudi Arabia have outlawed leaving marks or scars on your wife and children when you beat them. What kind of ruling is this? No welts, no cuts, no whip marks. And you just know that because the Saudis have ruled on this it's going to hit us here in the U.S., twice as hard. Not only will women beating be against the law, just writing about it can get you sent to the slam for a nickel. I'll be an old man by the time I get out. I mean, if I can't smack a dame around in my novels, or bruise her up, where's the fun, not to mention my disappointed readers. I don't know, we have got to do something. Anyone have any ideas? Who are we going to take our macho out on?

BUT, that's not even the bad news. In California, legalizing Mary Jane is on November's ballot. WHAT IF IT PASSES? We're screwed. One more plot gone. I have a complete manuscript finished, edited, ready to go, but the subject is hijacked ganja coming into the L.A. Port. What am I supposed to do with twenty tons of high grade Pocolo from Maui? Change it to Food Stamps? Which reminds me, I have to run downtown and pick up my stamps and check....times are all ready hard on writers.  What's going to happen to us.Any Thoughts? Ideas? Solutions?

UFO'S SPOTTED OVER THE U.S. . SCI-FI AUTHORS IN ECSTASY

Sci-Fi writers  can be found watching the skies over New York and El Paso, what with all the strange lights hovering over those cities the last few days and nights. Strange coordinated maneuvers witnessed by thousands conjure up images of Han Solo , Chew Baka, and Yoda. Any Science Fiction writer worth her salt will be found laying out gazing at the heavens, hoping to be beamed up. My first experience with Sci Fi was Edgar Rice Burroughs, CAPTAIN CARTER OF MARS.  WOW! Talk about an Action thriller. I can see how a writer can get lost in other worlds, inhabited with Galactic Goo with human-like features, and two-headed damsels in distress.

Me? I'll stick to Action Thrillers, popping the bad guys with my "Nine", chasing Dames, drinking black coffee all night on a stake out, peeing in an empty coke can, waiting for the perp to show up.